7/09/2010

Types of Dominance

There are many roles that Tops can be in BDSM. Here are just a few.

Top
A top is generally someone wielding the "instruments of terror" in the relationship. This is a very generic name for anyone who plays the top, including doms, masters, trainers, and the like. Also, a top often means there is little to no power exchange in the relationship.

Sadist
A sadist is just what it sounds like: a top who enjoys inflicting pain on the bottom. This term usually means someone who enjoys hitting, hurting, flogging, pain play, and the like, without a power exchange.

Dom/Domme
This implies a power exchange, whether it is full-time D/s or only in the bedroom. This person may make rules, establish protocol, and otherwise control the bottom. However, this term doesn't imply the complete ownership that Master or Mistress does.

Master/Mistress
This is a full-time, total power exchange. The slave has no control once she has consented to the relationship. Like a Dom, the Master may have rules, rituals, and protocol for the slave to use. There may be restrictions on what furniture the slave may use or the slave may be required to ask permission before speaking, using the restroom, or eating. The Master often has complete and total control, and the slave is a piece of owner property.

Owner
While a Master is indeed a type of owner, the difference here is that a Master owns a slave and an Owner can own a slave or a human animal. The owner may have a puppy or kitty bottom, for example.

Trainer
A trainer is a specific type of top that, in my experience, owns a (human) horse. In BDSM pony play communities, there are often elaborate annual horse competitions where human horses must compete exactly like a real horse competition. Their owners spend months and years training them for these competitions.

Daddy/Mommy
Those tops who are engaged in age play or have Adult Babies (AB) are called Daddies and Mommies. Sometimes, the Daddy is also a Dom or a Master, but the "Daddy" persona is more tender, playful, and parental.

Of course, there is no reason that you have to pick one kind of topping and stick with it. Variety is the spice of life! My Dom is sometimes more of a "daddy" figure during scenes, and I change how I address him accordingly. Also, a sadist could also be a Master or Owner or Dom. You can be any kind of top you and your sub are comfortable with. Explore and have fun!

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